Marriage Is An Adventure
Living the married life, for me, is a true adventure and more so lately. Hubs and I are between homes, moving from one we’ve been at for over nineteen years and our soon-to-be place of retirement. This includes still working at our full-time jobs for a few more months, several trips back and forth on the weekends, a puppy, and gardens to tend at each location. And it includes me finding a new full-time job and continuing to write and market my books.
When we are in our current home, we are busy working and living life as though nothing has changed – except that there are usually boxes and bins either waiting to be packed up or waiting to be transported down south. When we are at our soon-to-be retirement place, we are busy cleaning up the property and getting it ready to live on soon. We take walks, separately or together. We dream of what it will be like once we get moved. And we make plans for all the little things that still need done.
In general, life is busy, but it is even more hectic during this transition. When we go down south, we are taking stuff with us. I am taking those bins and boxes and small furniture from our current house, and hubs is taking tools from his sheds and stuff from our backyard. It is a constant goal and challenge to pack up rooms on our stay-home weekends, so that we make good use of our trips. When we make that one last trip down south, we hope to have much, much less to take with us.
Marriage Is For Being Sweet
During all of this we are, amazingly, staying sane and being sweet to each other. We are caring about each other’s health. We are trying to make sure we sleep enough and eat right. Of course, this doesn’t work out well when either of us visits the grocery store on an empty stomach. But it does convey our love for each other, when one of us secretly throws out the last slice of cake that I cannot eat and hubs should not be eating.
What I am discovering after almost thirty-three years together is that life is better now than it has ever been. We take time for each other. We listen to each other. We are more patient with each other. And we pause in conversation to understand each other better. The days are sweeter because we are taking time to enjoy being with each other. We are putting aside our tiredness, our grumpiness, and our impatience to be kind to one another.
I’m not sure if this is from finally reaching that place in a relationship where we are comfortable with each other. I don’t know if, after all these years, we have learned that good communication and kindness are the keys to lasting happiness. And I’m wondering if it is the country air and excitement for our new life of retirement that has us both on the same page of affection and intimacy. Whatever it is, I am enjoying this chapter in our lives and am appreciating our journey to this point.
Marriage Is Always Changing
If you have been married as long as we have, then you may know what I mean. If you are starting out, you may wonder what I am talking about. And if you are in a rut in your marriage and are not sure what to do to shake it up, perhaps you can reflect on what it is that brought you and your life partner together. For me and hubs, it was a lot of little things. We love the great outdoors. We used to go camping and fishing in our dating days and early married life (before child). And we’re looking forward to getting back out on the lake again, once we get moved and settled.
Over the years, and many have been either extremely challenging or a day-in-day-out monotony due to working to make a living, I have learned that life can be unexpected. It is in those moments that I have often realized that I am right where I want to be, right with the person I knew was the one. I am grateful to be living this la vida loca life with hubs. And I am looking forward to being fully transitioned in our new “retired” life together.
Marriage Is About Little Things
How about you? Are you living La Vida Loca? In what way? Every year is a chapter in your life together. And every chapter has it’s ups and downs. What chapter are you on? What are things that you enjoy together but haven’t been doing? For me and hubs, we love dancing at home together (mainly, because no one can see us mess up, lol). We also love grilling together on Friday or Saturday evenings, depending on the weather.
Mostly, I have enjoyed best the times when hubs and I take time to visit and talk with each other. Whether it’s been in a boat fishing, on a long trip to visit family, or on our back patio chairs watching the hummingbirds flit back and forth. In the dark or what can be considered dull moments of our marriage, I have always remembered the things I love most about hubs. I have not lost sight of who he is and why I married him, why he was the one. I hope this is the same for you and your other half.
In this crazy life, let us all remember that it’s the little things that make living la vida loca memorable and meaningful.
Weekly blogs on marriage are usually posted on the second Sunday of each month, then shared on other platforms, including but not limited to Pinterest, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram and Facebook.
Next scheduled topic will be on social media on the fourth Sunday of this month.
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Thank you for reading and continue to keep safe out there. Blessings!
Virginia Alice Crawford 